They Should Ban Bonfire Night (Part 2)

I am so glad I provide my family with so many opportunities to embarass me and demonstrate my short-comings to the world. You remember I left you yesterday because my elderly cat had disgraced himself again.... well, it was fairly spectacular, even by Harry's standards! Usually it's just hair balls or biscuits, gobbled too fast and instantly returned. This time we had the full works. I won't go into detail - just use your imagination x10!

Emily was fascinated! She has known cats and their habits all her short life but she had never witnessed such double incontinence before - and all over the sitting room carpet!

We dealt with this in a calm and composed manner. I was very proud of myself. The smell had gone by the time Steve got in and the carpet will dry, eventually. I thought I had distracted Emily with an early bath and an extra story. We avoided the sitting room this morning and chatted happily on the way to school. She was a bit quieter than usual but she's a thoughtful child and her best friend was poorly so didn't join us on our walk.

Foolish me! You'd think I would have learnt by now. They don't forget. They don't know tact or discretion. They are just waiting for the most opportune moment. Emily decided her most opportune moment was in front of the entire playground, full of children, parents and a visiting big wig from somewhere.......

Yes, she let them have it in full technicolour and at full volume. We may have to change schools. I may have to resign from the PTA. I can still hear the sniggering. I may be forced to wipe that superior smug look off D***** A****'s face. She may have forgotten the incident with the windowcleaner and the negligee but I haven't!

Rats! This was supposed to be about Bonfire Night. Maybe tomorrow. I have to go and have a little talk with Emily.